swfla

It takes all kinds....LOL

Caller: Hi, is this the police?

Dispatcher: This is 911. Do you need police assistance?

Caller: Well, I don't know who to call. Can you tell me how to cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before.

--

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one. Fire or emergency?

Called: Fire, I guess.

Dispatcher: How can I help you, sir?

Caller: I was wondering.....does the Fire Dept. put snow chains on their trucks?

Dispatcher: Yes sir, do you have an emergency?

Caller: Well, I've spent the last 4 hours trying to put these chains on my tires and....well.... do you think the Fire Dept. could come over and help me?

Dispatcher: Help you what?

Caller: Help me get these chains on my car!

--

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one. What is the nature of your emergency?

Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.

Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.

Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one.

Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.

Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

--

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one. What's the nature of your emergency?

Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.

Dispatcher: Is this her first child?

Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband.

--

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.

Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn...I think I'm going to pass out.

Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?

Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster. Damn......

Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?

Caller: No.

Dispatcher: What where you doing before you started having trouble breathing?

Caller: Running from the police

I think most people can... the brain's autocorrect function is far superior to mickeysofts.

I wonder how hard it is for folks whose fiest language is other than English?? English is such a hard langusge to learn....tough...through....slough

best web comic ever. discontinued, sadly.

www.sexylosers.com

best series IMHO:

KENTA'S HORNY MOM

http://www.sexylosers.com/strips.html#4

MIKE'S LEFT HAND

http://www.sexylosers.com/strips.html#3

and SHIUNJI AND THE SUICIDE GIRL

http://www.sexylosers.com/strips.html#2

Pretty funny stuff!!LOL

80's and talk radio, neal boortz makes me laugh!!

... and bought a new iMac! i got the 20inch with 2x2ghz, 1GB RAM and 256MB gfx card! was pretty expensive though (1500euros) but looks sooooo beautiful! and OS 10 is also way better than windows!

You can share music with an IPOD now!!

BTW...my wedding watch:

Congrats!! Nice choice of watch too!

Greetings from sunny Naples, FL

For a while, I was concerned that the end was near. LOL Now there are several new beginnings. It's nice to see so many active dedicated rep lovers .......David.