Vistar

Time Management A man sits down to dinner in a fine restaurant, and places his order with an immaculately dressed waiter. "I'll have the filet of beef cooked medium-rare, blue lake snap beans, roasted red potatoes and she crab soup." The waiter, having written nothing down, repeats the order exactly, and then looks at his watch and tells the man, "If there is nothing else you care for... your soup will arrive in exactly seven minutes." The waiter then turns sharply on his heels and goes to the kitchen. In exactly seven minutes, the waiter returns with a steaming bowl of she crab soup. The man is quite impressed and asks the waiter exactly how he can be so precise. The waiter stiffens and tells the man in a very superior manner that it is all about proper time management. "Through experience, we have learned exactly how much time is required to prepare and serve every dish that we offer. Once the time has been determined, we adhere to duplicating the serving time to the minute, plus or minus 29 seconds. Our guests do not have the wherewith all to judge our efficiency beyond that." The man then looks at his bowl of soup and then to the waiter. "You may be efficient in terms of time management, but you forgot to bring me a soup spoon." The waiter then draws from the inside vest pocket of his tuxedo a silver soup spoon and, with a condescending smirk, smartly places it on the outside of the man's place setting. The man looks at the waiter and tells him, "You think you are so smart, but you're no better than anyone else. In fact, there's a string hanging from the zipper of your pants." The waiter smirks again and in a very superior tone of voice tells the man, "That "string" as you call it, serves a purpose. It requires exactly 33 seconds to adequately cleanse one's hands after using bathroom facilities. With the string I am able to operate my zipper without touching it and the need for washing hands is eliminated. I save 33 seconds every time I use the bathroom. The man begins laughing, "Well, smart guy, you may think the string helps with the zipper, but that doesn't address the real issue. How do you "handle" tucking it in before closing the zipper?" "Sir, that is why I carry a spoon!"