Subject: Hell Explained By A Chemistry Student

[TwoTone]

Subject: Hell Explained By A Chemistry Student

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of

Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so

"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the

Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of

enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic

(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law

(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some

variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So

we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the

rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume

that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls

are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at

the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these

religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you

will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and

since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project

that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we

can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because

Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in

Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand

proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls

enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase

until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls

in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell

freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman

year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,"

and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then

number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic

and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that

since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any

more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven,

thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why,

last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

[boomer775]

Seen this before. An absolute Classic.

[Admin]

Yeah...seen it before, bit still love it...

Dunno if you ever heard the one about the philosophy-student and his graduation exam

The topic was:

"What is courrage?"

The students had 8 hours available to write about this topic. One of the students got up after 5 minutes and handed in his paper. This was also the only student to get an A. On the single page he had handed it, there were two words:

This is!

[boomer775]

Yeah...seen it before, bit still love it...

Dunno if you ever heard the one about the philosophy-student and his graduation exam

The topic was:

"What is courrage?"

The students had 8 hours available to write about this topic. One of the students got up after 5 minutes and handed in his paper. This was also the only student to get an A. On the single page he had handed it, there were two words:

This is!

wow - that person's got bigger balls than my avatar

[Admin]

wow - that person's got bigger balls than my avatar

If you call that big balls(avatar), you're nuts