Chronus Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 In Saudi Arabia an Everton fan, a Liverpool fan and a Man Utd were all sharing a smuggled crate of beer. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the beer, they were sentenced to death. However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment. By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one of you a wish before your whipping." The Man U fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he thought about this for a while and then said: Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Man U fan had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done. The Everton fan was next up (he almost finished a half-can), and after watching the scene, said: "Please fix two pillows on my back." However the two pillows only lasted 15 lashes before the whip went through. The Everton fan was carried away crying and vowing to win next year. The Liverpool fan was the last one up (he had finished off the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a beautiful part of the world, your city has some of the best and most loyal football fans in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!" "Cheers mate, your Most Royal and Merciful highness", The Liverpool fan replies. "In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes." "Not only are you an honourable, handsome and a powerful man, you are also very brave," the Sheik says with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Sheik asks. "Please tie the Man Utd fan to my back." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b16a2 Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 haha very good! .....and what a game the last night! I must say after the dismal results we were discussing last time, this performance was spectacular! If only we could do this more consitently! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronus Posted April 9, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 haha very good! .....and what a game the last night! I must say after the dismal results we were discussing last time, this performance was spectacular! If only we could do this more consitently! Yep, hoping for a CL (though it won't be easy!)... if that means beating Chelsea and man ure in the final, does that make LFC the best club in England ? It won't be easy though... Commiserations to Arsenal... contributed to a great game, pity there had to be a winner... hope you hammer the Mancs this weekend on the way to winning the League title Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specialvat Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Time to book your russian visa's gents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fitmic Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronus Posted April 9, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Time to book your russian visa's gents. I'm not counting on anything yet... I have higher hopes with this semi.... but then again, Ballack is finally playing up to his ability. Petr Cech will be back too. I'll just quietly enjoy it and hope for the win It's a pity man ure have a bye to the final... Barca is really poor this year, wouldn't surprise me if Schalke 04 (Schalke!) manage to knock them out... they are so goal-shy though. Watch Rafinha, their right-back, apparently the deal for him to move to LFC in the summer is all done. I was hoping for Daniel Alves but he's so expensive. Hoping for Ricardo Quaresma too Talk is Pennant off to Newcastle, and Milan of all teams are interested in Harry Kewell on a free. If anyone will get him back into shape, it's them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b16a2 Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 It is a shame we had to play Arsenal at that stage, it would have made a great final. I have a great respect for them, they play such lovely football when they put their minds to it. Even though I was cheering for Liverpool, for the first 25 minutes I was almost willing Arsenal to score! As for Chelsea, don't like them, so it will be a pleasure to put them out (hopefully ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordRasta Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 LOL!! I needed a good laugh. Any other heartbroken Arsenal fans out there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratchpot Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Sheik asks. "Please tie the Man Utd fan to my back." Typical of a Liverpool fan not to take his beating like a man... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
narikaa Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Two Mancs opening a shop on Granby Street Liverpool are sitting in the empty shop waiting on stock being delivered. First Manc says to his mate 'Bet you we have some nosey scouse bastard asking what we are selling' Sure enough within five minutes the door opens and a small scouse guy says ' What yous sellin in ere den lar?' The Mancs smile and give their prearranged answer ' Were selling arseholes' Without missing a beat the scouser replies 'Jees you must be doing well....youve only got two left' . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronus Posted April 9, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 That's a good one Narikaa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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