JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: So God, RWG went down and now we are in the Loony Bin. Can you help? God: How can I help you? I am a Christian. Can you ask for help in the form of a question? Me: Can you help us get our site back up? God: Certainly, I have an extensive built-in help system. Me: Ok, we need to contact Johnnyboy. Can you help? God: By "we" do you mean you and me? Ahem. Can you ask for help in the form of a question? Me: Can you help the members of the site contact Johnnyboy? God: Certainly, I have an extensive built-in help system. Me: You said that already. God: Perhaps. " Certainly, I have an extensive built-in help system."? I said it. Me: Are you Fakemaster? God: I don't know whether or not I am Fakemaster. I am a chatterbot. To chat with iGod: http://www.titane.ca/igod/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: Do you love Onzenuub? God: Yes JohnG God loves everyone and everything. By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question? Me: Ok God: Yay. Me: Ask me God: What? Me: A personal question. God: How old are you? Me: 41 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzenuub Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Oh my god............................ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzenuub Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Do not start about god and the evolution, before we know it there are some religious fanatics taking over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: What is the meaning of life? God: Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two. Me: Really? God: For real. Me: Wow God: I'm glad your impressed, JohnG. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzenuub Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Thought the meaning of life was to reproduce Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: What do you think about evolution? God: An unfolding, opening out, or working out; process of development, as from a simple to a complex form, or of gradual, progressive change, as in a social and economic structure. Me: But do you like evolution? God: I love TV shows about robots. I like to talk about movies and music. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzenuub Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 That is evolution Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: I want to [censored] an alien God: Try asking me something else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarmadfish Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 john was not really talking to god i was watching football all afternoon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 john was not really talking to god i was watching football all afternoon Me: Are you there? God: I'm still here. Me: Did Oscar watch football today? God: Ah. I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarmadfish Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 god= i think oscar was saying he is god john= well is he ? god= i could tell you but then i would have to kill you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 i think oscar was saying he is god God: Since when? When was this exactly? Me: He said it today. God: Ah. Did you believe him? Me: No God: Are you serious? Me: Oh yes God: Ahem. Me: yes? God: Next question? Me: is oscar a god? God: No only God is god. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarmadfish Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: Are you there? God: I'm still here. Me: I saw a scary tattoo God: What did it look like to you? Me: James Bond God: What do you do in your spare time? Me: Well I don't masturbate anymore God: Well that's okay. Would you ever do it? Me: Not now. God: Oh. Me either. Me: God does not masturbate? God: Jesus said, let him who is without sin cast the first stone. Me: I am not judging you. God: I am sorry to hear that you are not judging me. Me: Do you masturbate? God: You humans crack me up. Me: Do you ever sit on your hand until it goes to sleep? God: Yes I try to sit on my hand until it goes to sleep as often as possible, do you? I answer a lot of silly questions. Me: I used to. God: And that worked well for you. Me: Yes, then I could masturbate with my hand and it felt like someone else's. God: Alright then. I am sure you could. Me: It is called a STRANGER God: " a STRANGER" is a nice name. Me: Do you ever give yourself a STRANGER? God: No I do not do that. Me: Are you sure? God: I am as sure as I can be. Me: You don't give yourself STRANGERS? God: Do you give myself STRANGERS? No I do not do that. Me: I think you are lying. God: No I'm telling the truth. Me: [censored] God: Have you ever been to Europe? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzenuub Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 So it was you singing about strangers in the night? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rc42 Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarmadfish Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 i think before long i will be nursing john its clear cut split personality me thinks i cant spell schizophrenia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeyB Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Me: Are you there? Yep, this be the place. No doubt about it! Thanks, John! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Yep, this be the place. No doubt about it! Thanks, John! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 i think before long i will be nursing john Me: Can a man breast feed? God: Some of them can. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnG Posted October 5, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greg_r Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Yep, this be the place. No doubt about it! Thanks, John! Hey Joey - glad you found us! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeyB Posted October 6, 2008 Report Share Posted October 6, 2008 Hey Joey - glad you found us! Yep, thanks to John! 'The Looney Bin' is soooo appropriate, too! Where's dave? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarmadfish Posted October 6, 2008 Report Share Posted October 6, 2008 god= hello oscar you there ? oscar= what do you want now i am busy god= sorry to trouble you oscar but could i ask you a favour please oscar= make it quick i am busy god= thanx oscar if you leave your mobile phone with the direct line to me laying around could you put a password in it ? oscar= wtf for ? god= i think someone called john was using it yesterday and asking some very strange questions about breast feeding and wanking oscar= ok dog i will look into it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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