Jump to content
When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission.
  • Current Donation Goals

Santa Is Pissed


KB

Recommended Posts

T'was the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed

He cussed out the elves and threw down his list

Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks

I have good mind to scrap the whole works

I've busted my ass for damn near a year

Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear

The old lady bitches cause I work late at night

The elves want more money - The reindeers all fight

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids

Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS

And just when I thought that things would get better

Those assholes from ATO sent me a letter

They say I owe taxes - if that ain't damn funny

Who the hell ever sent Santa Clause money?

And the kids these days - they all are the pits

They want the impossible... Those mean little shits

I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds

Assembling dolls... Their arms, legs and heads

I made a ton of yo yo’s - No request for them

They want computers and robots... They think I'm IBM!

If you think that's bad...just picture this

Try holding those brats... With their pants full of piss

They pull on my nose - they grab at my beard

And if I don't smile.... Their mums think I'm weird

Flying through the air...dodging the trees

Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees

I'm quitting this job...there's just no enjoyment

I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment

There's no Christmas this year...now you know the reason

I found me a blonde.. I'm going SOUTH for the season!!

I'll laze in the sun-into bed I'll get tucked

And those snotty nosed brats….. Can go and get f.........

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...
Please Sign In or Sign Up