FxrAndy Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS 40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No [censored] Average looking = Ugly Beautiful = Pathological liar Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure = On medication Feminist = Fat Free spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very *friendly* person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy drunk Professional = [censored] Voluptuous = Very Fat Large frame = Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate = Stalker WOMEN'S ENGLISH: 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = Let's have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you 11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay And finally..... A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle . For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features. However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside. NOW SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND A WOMAN WITH A SENSE OF HUMOUR!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fitmic Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwoTone Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Archived... TT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dutchy Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Fantastic! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victoria Posted August 27, 2007 Report Share Posted August 27, 2007 "The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is “What does a woman want?”" - Sigmund Freud Easy. Love. Protection. A laugh. And not to be judged. Please send this to men in need of guidance, and women in need of a hug. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnkaz Posted September 1, 2007 Report Share Posted September 1, 2007 Excellent. Emailed to several pals. Cheers Johnkaz. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wannab Posted September 9, 2007 Report Share Posted September 9, 2007 I've seen that before but its still good for a laugh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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