Manly Man vs. Girly Man Test

[importr]

THE MANLY MAN VS. GIRLY MAN TEST

1. If you're over forty, and you have a washboard stomach,

you are a queer. It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the

boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics,

and doing the Oprah diet...f a g..

2. If you have a cat, you are a homo. A cat is like a dog,

but queer-- it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has

a delicate touch except when it uses its claws, and whines to be fed.

And just think about how you call a dog..... 'Killer, come here! I said

get your ass over here, Killer!' Now think about how you call a

cat...'Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!' Jeeez, you're so queer.

3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, or any such

nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on

BBQ ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, lobster backs, pickled pigs feet, or

t i t s . Anything else and you are a Homo in training and undeniably a fa g.

4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or

pi$$ in a parking lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship. A man's

world is his toilet; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.

5. If you drink anything other than regular coffee, you're

as fairy as Tinkerbelle. A straight man will never be heard ordering a

'Decaf Soy Latte'. If you've put a Decaf Soy Latte to your lips, you've

had a man there too..

6. If you know more than six names of non-standard colours

or four different types of dessert other than ice cream and custard, you

might as well be handing out free ass passes. A real man doesn't have

memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap. If you can pick

out chartreuse you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other

than cotton or denim, you are a peter puffer.

7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it,

you're dying to tune a meat whistle. A man only puts both hands on the

wheel to honk at a slow-assed driver or to cut the p rick off. The rest

of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a

hamburger, or hold his beer.

8. If you do not send this off to all the males on your

email list because you are afraid of hurting their feelings, then you're

definitely on the verge of being a salami smuggler.

[mjmurphy926]

THE MANLY MAN VS. GIRLY MAN TEST

1. If you're over forty, and you have a washboard stomach,

you are a queer. It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the

boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics,

and doing the Oprah diet...f a g..

2. If you have a cat, you are a homo. A cat is like a dog,

but queer-- it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has

a delicate touch except when it uses its claws, and whines to be fed.

And just think about how you call a dog..... 'Killer, come here! I said

get your ass over here, Killer!' Now think about how you call a

cat...'Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!' Jeeez, you're so queer.

3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, or any such

nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on

BBQ ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, lobster backs, pickled pigs feet, or

t i t s . Anything else and you are a Homo in training and undeniably a fa g.

4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or

pi$$ in a parking lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship. A man's

world is his toilet; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.

5. If you drink anything other than regular coffee, you're

as fairy as Tinkerbelle. A straight man will never be heard ordering a

'Decaf Soy Latte'. If you've put a Decaf Soy Latte to your lips, you've

had a man there too..

6. If you know more than six names of non-standard colours

or four different types of dessert other than ice cream and custard, you

might as well be handing out free ass passes. A real man doesn't have

memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap. If you can pick

out chartreuse you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other

than cotton or denim, you are a peter puffer.

7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it,

you're dying to tune a meat whistle. A man only puts both hands on the

wheel to honk at a slow-assed driver or to cut the p rick off. The rest

of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a

hamburger, or hold his beer.

8. If you do not send this off to all the males on your

email list because you are afraid of hurting their feelings, then you're

definitely on the verge of being a salami smuggler.

Jeez, Looks like I'm about as hetero as a man can be! I pretty much live every one of these.

"A man's world is his toilet!"

[plaifender]

So.. i'm manly under ever category except the cat one.

I have a lion.. is that still considered homo????

[mjmurphy926]

So.. i'm manly under ever category except the cat one.

I have a lion.. is that still considered homo????

LOL...Nah...If your cat can eat you, that's even more hetero than a dog...

[subbiesrock]

LOL...Nah...If your cat can eat you, that's even more hetero than a dog...

Hahaha

[JoJo35]

LOL...Nah...If your cat can eat you, that's even more hetero than a dog...

lol... how cool is that

[tenacious_b]

Pure awesome!

[txcollector]

I had to google chartreuse to figure out if it was a color or a dessert