jonthebhoy

Rogered With Grapes

The 'gonzo' part of his name tells me all I need to know.

For feck sake. Feckin wooses! We have to put up this every year and god forbid Londons got a bit of snow. Well forgive me for not giving a sh*t. They now get cold weather allowance cos they get a bit of snow every 10 years! We get it every feckin year and they still get the same allowance! Meh meh meh! It's now national (English TV monopoly!) news! Har de feckin har. They make me laff...heartily.

It's a pile of pish! (White frozen pish - don't eat the yellow stuff if your stuck outside in your back garden and the huskies can't get you the 10 feet to your back door!)

JTB

I appreciate the reply cluing me in (and the wacky ones as well). Many thanks.

However, I think some of the others, smug and snippy are over the top. I said I was sorry for my ignorance. I looked at the NOOBY stuff and the homepage. It wasn't obvious to ME!!! Btw, for those who asked if I was a new member, taking a page from your own book, how could I have set up an avatar if I wasn't. So, we all do dumb things--duh! I'd suggest cutting everyone a little slack.

Again, I'm sorry, but if this is what I get here there are a lot of other forums that are more user friendly.

I'm an avid contributor to other sites and looked forward to being so here, too.

Sorry to have bothered those who could take the time to reply, but slap me around.

All the best.

Don't take it to heart - it's all part of the initiation here. Many years ago I asked a stupid question about batteries and rightly got shredded for it. The jokes weren't on you but your post was a vehicle for a bit of fun. Relax - you are very welcome here.

JTB

Yeah 'The South' are having a wee bit of snow and are having jolly awful trouble coping.

Up here we're kind of used to it and manage rather well thank you very much.

JTB

This place definitely has all the right ingredients for the watch enthusiast!

(I could do this all day you know)

JTB

'War' - Edwin Starr

Purple Haze - Hendrix

Not 'brother' muse but what about...

'What's So Funny About Peace, Love and Understanding' - Costello version.

More to follow.

JTB

Reprehensible Warped Goons

Moocro economics...meh!

Welcome back Chef to the cordon bleu of rep sites!

A pair of steel toed Timbies and you have a nice combo there.

Ask yourself this as well.....now that you've revealed that your rep is inferior to a new arrival, what do you think potential customers might do?

He'll wear what he sees the other guy wearing.

Anon - "I may be big headed but if I stuck it in your mouth it would rattle about from side to side."

Churchill - god! (with a small g)

Q: How many women with PMT does it take to change a light

bulb?

Woman's Answer:

One!

ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? because no one else in this f***n house knows HOW to change a f***n light bulb! They

don't even know that the f***n bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE f***n DAYS before they figured it out.

And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the god damned light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the f***n chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would < /span>STILL BE IN THE SAME f***n SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER

THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO F**er EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES

OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATEDFROM THE F***N PILES OF GARBAGE THAT

ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE F***N HOUSE!!

IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND

DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES

THE F***N TOILET PAPER ROLL !!

I'm sorry.

What was the question?

I wonder if we could get Moon on 20p?

I went to a Crate Amps promotion in Glasgow a couple of years ago and Joe Walsh was the 'name' endorsing the amps. He told some absolutely wonderful stories about Moonie and himself. When I've got some 'real' time, I'll relate a couple.

Edited to say.......sorry for the name drop!

Guys...is this really worth falling out over?

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world.

He bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando , thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read '$10,000 per call' .

The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for .

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God .

The American thanked the priest and went along his way .

Next stop was in Atlanta . There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was .

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God .

'O.K., thank you,' said the American .

He then travelled all across America , Africa, England , Japan , New Zealand . In every ch urch he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same '$US10,000 per call' sign under it. .

The American decided to travel to Scotland to see if Scots had the same phone .

He arrived in Scotland and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same looking golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read '40 pence per call.'

The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign .

'Father, I've travelled all over the world and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches . I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in all of them price was $10,000 per call . Why is it so cheap here?'

The priest smiled and answered, 'You're in Scotland now, son - it's a local call' .

Bob...You need these........they never fail me........just don't use them when you're driving!

JTB

It took me a while but I finally worked out the link in this thread.

We went from mountains through camels

mmm!

This is fine as long as all possible other, perhaps more proactive steps have been exhausted and I don't think this is the case. Rather Orwellian if your asking me and a step away from the "steralisation after 2 kids" lobby.

JTB

'Geography' has it's place, but just anchor me up on a reef and I'm good.

So, anyway, did you hear the one about Demsey and the girl goin' out fishing? She came home with a big red Snapper.

Yes, those are 'bean bags' up at the bow.........................

<edit> Quick edit before it times out. I have a problem with the rehtoric of this topic header. About as much as I do with the "Reign of the White Supremacist......" one. 'Anti-Nanuq' indeed! Can't we all just get along?

That's a thing of stunning beauty Dems........and the fish isn't bad either! Boom boom!

Auntie Nanuq Ken......something we ought to know?