Here's an old story from awhile back... repeated just for fun. This happened on one of those harbor tours out of Seward, Alaska. This is what reps are for! I was with my brother on one of those glacier cruises where the boat takes you right up to the face of a glacier and toots the horn so the thing calves off big chunks of ice and scares the hell out of the tourists. I was wearing a newer model Sea Dweller from Andrew, and we were all up on top of the boat, there were lots of tourists milling around in gore-tex and down parkas. I had already noticed a few times that the watch would leak and fog up, and I hate that. So I nudged me baby brudder and whispered "watch this". I held my arm up to ostentatiously check the time, and Rolex Stainless Steel glistened and glittered in the sun like God's Own Bling. I then sucked in my breath in alarm and said "IT STOPPED! Look, this thing stopped again!" and showed it to my brother. He clucked his tongue, shook his head, and said something about "as expensive as that thing was, you'd think it would work!" and I agreed loudly. A couple of heads turned toward us. So I shook my wrist a few times, and held it up to my ear. Shaking my head in disgust, I took it off and waved my hand around wildly to "wind it" and got lots more people glancing at me nervously. Then I unscrewed the crown and wound it up madly with exaggerated motions, elbows flying, and listened again. "It's STILL dead!!!" I said to him, and I could see him suppressing a laugh. More people looked, so I tapped it a couple times on the railing, and held it to my ear again. DING DING DINGGGG!! He was dying by now, trying not to laugh. When I tapped the railing the metal pipe sort of rang a little, and more people looked. I listened to the watch again and said "This bloody piece of @#!*$%" and hit it harder on the railing. He was biting his lip and people were starting to stare. I held it up to my ear again and said loudly "YOU MISERABLE LOUSY CHEAP ROLEX!!!" and I turned and bashed it really really hard on the railing 5 or 6 times, WHANG WHANG WHANG WHANG!!! and the pipe was ringing and people were stepping back. Everyone was staring, and I held it up to my ear for a moment, the pipe was still ringing, and I shouted "YOU LOUSY PIECE OF SWISS CRAP!!!!" and I drew my arm back, big pause for effect, and threw that watch as far as I could out into the ocean. It made a really nice high arc, glittering in the sun, and landed with a nice big splash. My brother was nearly wetting himself, tears were rolling down his cheeks, and I stormed down the steps to the lower deck as people parted and let me through, their mouths gaping in astonishment. It was glorious.