jonthebhoy

Bloke goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants.

"I want to bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from

between your [censored]" he says.

"You dirty bastard!" shouts the barmaid, "get out before I get my

husband."

The bloke apologizes and promises not to repeat his gaffe.

The Barmaid accepts this and asks him again what he wants.

"I want to pull your pants down, spread yoghurt between the cheeks of

your [censored] and lick it all off."

She says, "You dirty filthy pervert! You're banned. Get out!!"

Again, the bloke apologizes and swears never ever to do it again.

"One more chance," says the barmaid, "Now - what do you want?"

"I want to turn you upside down, tear your knickers off and fill your

pussy with Guinness, and then drink every last drop from the hairy

cup."

The barmaid is furious at this personal intrusion, and runs upstairs

to fetch her husband, who's sitting quietly watching the telly.

"What's up love?" he asks.

"There's a bloke in the bar who wants to put his head between my [censored]

and lick the sweat off", she says.

"I'll kill him. Where is he?" storms the Husband.

"Then he said he wanted to pour yoghurt down between my [censored] cheeks

and lick it off" she screams.

"Right. He's dead!" says the husband, reaching for a cricket bat.

"Then he said he wanted to turn me upside down, fill my [censored] with

Guinness and then drink it all" she cries!

The husband puts down his bat and returns to his armchair, and

switches the telly back on.

"Aren't you going to do something about it?" she cries hysterically.

"Look love, I'm not messing with any bloke who can drink 15 pints of

Guinness..."

JTB

So who's Fool?

Will Fool

God's country awaits. Safe on your travels Puggy.

JTB

He who finds Will will be a fool.

In years to come this post will be revisited time and again and heralded as an equal of some of the greats such as jetmid's first and the TRL post to name a couple.

I came, I saw, I laughed.

JTB

Could not agree more. Very good post...although it'll probably not garner 25+ pages and 1,000s of views, it should.

Timm

63 posts and 1002 views so far in a day isn't bad. Mind you if we deduct all those posts that concerned themselves with "it won't get many views" then that'll take it down to maybe 23!

Interesting points Bill. I sort the wheat out from the chaff and still get a lot of fun here. Try it.

JTB

Where there's a will there's a berforce.

@JTB... since you're no. 10, you guys were sitting next to each other

We passed notes to one another in the WIS exams. Explains how I know hee-haw about watches!

(Only kidding Faber)

JTB

Welcome back Faber. Much to read is an understatement. Could take you a while.

JTB

Let me know what you think about the size.

The size matters

Thank you good sir, but I think I'd likely break her in half ... she is still full of narcotics and stitches and is very very sore.

But cancer-free and on the mend!! It feels very very good to be able to say that.

This is the best piece of good news on this board in a long time and it has nothing to do with watches.

My very best wishes are coming your way. Look after her...........even more!

JTB

........and remember this is now the official refuge thread!

JTB

I found out that my beloved Ms. Nanuq does NOT have cancer, after many tests and some significant surgeries.

I am one grateful pup today.

Wondeful news Bob.........give her a big Scottish hug from me laddie!

JTB

That's funny: all of a sudden I don't want to post here anymore....

(DELETED)

Sheesh.........anarchists!

As a mod here I prefer to maintain an impartial position however might I be so bold as to suggest that discussions and/or arguments remain civil in order that all parties feel free and unthreatened in order to present their points of view.

On another point perhaps the initiator of the thread should script in simple and straightforward terms the questions that he feels require answering by the four dealers in question in order that the membership can assess for themselves, based on their responses, where the truth lies.

A new thread might be the best approach here with a pm calling notice to those same dealers to visit and respond.

JTB

You picked a good day. There's a rootin an a tootin in town. Welcome.

JTB

No posting rules have temporarily been suspended here in order that members may find shelter from the other thread.

This ends this public service announcement.

The Management.

"For every time I've posted here, there are 273 times I haven't" - Oscar Wilde

At last.............we now finally know who has the best sub! You do!

JTB

Are you a moderator or something? Because it sounds like you like giving advice when it isn't asked.

My case doth rest!

JTB

So because you have a post count over 1,000 I guess this makes you a professional?

Post count is for postwhores and people like you who think establishing themselves in a forum on the internet makes them so knowledgable.

You don't have to say it because your attitude says it all.....

What I do see is Daniel Craig as your avatar.

The fact is I don't need to know anyone on this board to understand why they buy or collect reps.

You obviously skimmed thru my last post because you didn't answer my questions.

You probably couldn't answer them.

Wrong on all counts.

For the record - the making of a good member is someone who is prepared to put time into learning the subject and in getting to know the established members on the forum with a modicum of respect and deference to the fact that they, in most cases, have got through these two important phases way before you. On both counts you have a long ways to go.

JTB

Is this thing still going, and i stopped posting because it said so!!

I'm glad there's someone with some sense around here!

JTB

Someone told me that I could find some bread over here? Who has the bread?

/Tim

YOU'RE IN THE WRONG THREAD MAN!

YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THIS STUFF:

SHORTBREAD!!!

NOW PLEASE LEAVE BY THE NEAREST AVAILABLE EXIT. THIS IS THE 'SHORT THREAD' THREAD

JTB

well, thank goodness.. this thread finally seems to be dying down... at this rate it will soon be gone.

Agreed........this is a momentous day in the history of this thread.

Let's continue to keep this thread bare.

JTB