cornerstone

You're not kidding - he's already had his first "miracle" turning wine in water! (I can do a similar sort of trick with beer, but well...) John Wood, 10-time Gold Logie nominee, and Buddha's Wine - turning wine into water for CARE Australia [Totally OT; I was intrigued the other day that I wrote 'go Gary, go' when the ad is clearly 'no, Gary no'. Was that some kind of weird ex-smoker Freudian slip?! Does my mind see that ad and go, "go on Gary, have a smoke for us all!" ]

I always liked the story of a son emigrating from Scotland to Nova Scotia and his mother writing to another family member in Vancouver to come and meet him. She got the response "you meet him, you're closer!" @thomasng: bad business with that passport. You're really caught with immigration, because if you lose your temper in frustration, you're doubly-screwed. Been plenty of stories of people being turned away at US immigration on a whim.

LOL!! Good work. Will be a better place for still having you - even if 'V' is an unspeakably cool new username!! Cheers!

Tsk, ain't that always the way. At least it must be nice to hear something about the watch's whereabouts. Best of luck - and post pics when it arrives!

Well it is a nation and country, but not in an international political sense. It doesn't have complete sovereignty - as in the other parts of the UK can democratically impose laws there. Also it is not internationally recognised (nor does it claim to be) an independent country - it couldn't pull up a seat at the United Nations. The political unit is the UK.

Jeez - when did these tax free perks start?!

Let's just say he's definitely having a good time. The Celtic guy looks a little self-conscious, but the Rangers guy looks like, well, he just got off the Special Needs bus.

Is there a particular reason why the Rangers fan looks such a [censored]? I mean, we're all laughing. But it's his face....c'mon. NB He does at least have a watch!

Quite right. lol! Pointing out that Lothian Road is longer is the work of genius ROTFL. So more murders, but aha! less murders per inch! [seriously - love it] I'm well out of the loop - last time I went anywhere near Lothian Rd on the [censored], the main 'club' was probably called Century 2000 (? I think?). Days of 50p vodkas and the like. Didn't pan out too well violence wise. Someone even nicked my jacket - and I specifically had a pub jacket that was [censored] just so someone didn't steal it. It was awful. But yes, if you shut down the nightlife the problem would sort itself out. I was too much of a cheap [censored] for George St, even on a wage. Used to joke about "you've got a better chance of being stabbed in Lothian Road than in the whole of New York" because of course in New York they would shoot you instead. On another note: really free parking?! Sweet deal! That's gonna hurt when you lose that! When I finished uni, I got a job and suddenly found myself poorer! No discounts, council tax (which I didn't pay I might add, I think it expired after six years on the run!)

Aye, that's why Glasgae's so friendly. Cos all the weegies are on day trips east. You know I've chosen you for my 'Adopt a Weegie' programme. You get one knife, a cap of your choice, and some great patter for jumping the kebab shop queue.

It's one of the really weird things that you can live in a country, not see it, but take the time to see the rest of the world. I've never been to Yorkshire, nor really much of the north of England. Newcastle (on way to Norway) once. Don't think Nottingham counts as the north. But that's it. It's the same everywhere though - I've never met an Australian that has been to Ayer's Rock. Even New Yorkers that had not made it to the Statue of Liberty. I don't think the Hovis ads did Yorkshire many favours, especially when Leeds is supposed to be pretty cosmopolitan these days. That said, Glasgow has had a millstone of an image of being a tough and frightening city, when in reality it is astoundingly friendly. Go anywhere in the world, and you will find few places where more strangers come up to you and just chat. And there's big money in Glasgow too; serious money. Bearsden - the part of Glasgow so upmarket, it pretends it's not even in Glasgow. [Meant to say earlier on the coke subject. Worst moment with a Scottish accent in an Australian shop wasn't me, was a family member in a bakery. He asked the lady for a blackcurrant tart. First problem was, she didn't know that a tart was a common name for a bakery product (like I tend to pronounce croissant like I learned in French, without the "T" - 100% of the time I'm corrected, "oh, a crassanTTT"). Anyway, she didn't know what a tart was, and frankly blackcurrant turned out to be a bit of a surprise. She thought he was calling her a "black c*nt tart". Got a bit ugly!]

Eclectic indeed! Any particular rationale behind the order? I only know Rachmaninoff from the film Shine. In the film everyone thinks the guy (David Helfgott) is a bit of an idiot savant, but basically a genius. Sadly, in real life apparently the experts say that he's not very good at playing the piano. Which, lets face it, is an important part of the film

Loved it Every time I think it won't crack me up, it does. We had tears at some points. WTF was that puppet with a paper plate for a head in the Latvian song?! And how many times did the host say 'Amazing'! Some of the songs had a bit of the 'My Lovely Horse' about them for anyone who knows Father Ted. As in, please don't let us have to pay to host it next year! The British entry was abysmal. I spent whole song looking like this: Great winner. But all those countries voting gets a bit tiresome.

And a lot of these patron saints were just chosen on the basis of cloud formations - ooh, it's a bit blue and that cloud looks like a cross. Didn't St Andrew die on x-shaped cross? It can be our 'lucky' cloud formation. Sort of medieval equivalent of lucky football socks. Scotland shares St. Andrew with Russia and Greece I'm told. The English flag is taken from Genoa. They don't advertise that much. Freaks out English tourists in Genoa. Not sure who the patron saint of Australia is. Lisa McCune I think.

1. Kirkcudbright and Burntisland are also doozies. 3. Edinburgh can have at least eight. Glasgow has more of a 'tropical' weather system - you're either in the 'wet' or the 'dry'. Edinburgh has the 'windy' and the 'slightly less windy'. 5. I actually managed to slip down a spiral staircase once and not spill my pint. Reason was, the staircase was right above the bar - as I'm falling I'm thinking "you're going to look like a right [censored] if you drop your lager on the bar staff and then have to queue up for a new one." Screwed my back up instead. Good choice. 6. The ones near me these days have 'Holden' on them. Miss my ned / weegie friends. 10. Accomplished this just the other week - a woman let her pitbull out of her gate and just watched it race towards towards my baby daughter and then attack my dog. She learned some choice new vocabulary that day. No, she really learned it (or kent it!) 11. Like haggis, but why is it always served with feckin' neeps? I hate neeps! 12. Yes! 14. Or for that matter, ice cream, tins of baked beans, a one armed-bandit, and listeria. Cheers!

I'm shocked that some of you don't like this It is definitely "so bad it's good!" We love it every year, some of the appalling efforts some countries make. I used to try and get a beer from as many countries as I could - but it's very difficult since I moved to Australia! It's also difficult since the finalists are only decided at the last minute. Still - I try my best! It's a great drinking game if you're into that sort of thing. ONE WORD OF WARNING - we don't get to see it until SUNDAY night in Australia. So don't spoil it for me!! Speak in code!! In the UK (and Australia gets Terry Wogan's UK coverage) it's a big laugh. I'm pretty clear (from some of their entries) that Germany and Russia are in on the joke too. But it relies on countries taking it seriously to be funny. All that kitsch! And the voting too - all the underhand and corrupt voting is hysterical. Greece always gives Cyprus 12 points and vice versa. All the Balkans give each other loads of points. Geography is the single biggest factor in the point scoring - Ireland went from being the only non-UK country to sing in English (apart from maybe Malta?) and it used to win all the time. Now that many sing in English (or did last time around), Ireland has been geographically isolated (not enough friends) and it got relegated. Funny, funny stuff. Enjoy

One thought just occurred to me - when you ask that question here a lot of people think 'how long does a Asian rep last versus a Swiss ETA movement' or 'rep versus genuine'. But you might be thinking they're just total crap - to which I would say they're pretty good watches - better than you could get by spending the same money retail. Of course mechanical watches bring more risks than battery powered quartz - but it's part of the 'charm'! There was a poll on the old RWI, where if my memory serves me 25% said they had some sort of problem with their Asian movement in the first three months - but the odds seemed fine. The comment above that it is a 'crap shoot' is quite right, you play the odds to be sure. But then it is possible to swap over the movement in a non-functioning watch. I have an Asian movement in my rep, and it works great (touch wood!) Best of luck

Great pictures - thanks! Love the third one down and the Omegas. Cheers!

PM sent with secret typing proficiency tutorial Or rather, a different link. By the way, for others: you need to "chestnut" both files. Cheers

Still chuckling....

Right, finally got my life in order.... Obviously I have had to work hard to find something that makes me look way more sophisticated and macho than I really am - which it makes it all the more disappointing that the best I could come up with was Morrissey! The main music I listening to at the moment is: 1. NEW ORDER - WAITING FOR THE SIREN'S CALL I just never seem to get bored of this album. 2. MORRISSEY - RINGLEADER OF THE TORMENTORS His latest. The infamous tight [censored] has actually stumped up for a real orchestra with this release. 3. IDLE TALK - "I don't know why" Hahaha...free plug! Still, "she's got that look of love in her eye".... Cheers!

Funny, I read that to mean he hated Sin City! It certainly polarised opinion: Nose bitten off in fight over quality of Sin City

The official (legal) amount of time it takes just to post something within Australia is four working days (as in, it doesn't arrive until the fifth working day)! I have found that timing the incoming post can save time (if you have any control over it), so that the parcel is 'in the air' over a weekend - means you don't lose working days on the ground. I'd be getting itchy feet after 25 days too (in a watched pot never boils kind of a way) - that has been plenty of weekends (!) but some parcels do take ages, more so if they have to be cleared.

Funny, funny, funny stuff! Brings it back - LOL! One of my favourite moments was in the last series with Naveed in the playground: "You dirty bastard!" Me and the missus were saying that for months. At the moment we're amusing ourselves by taking the [censored] out of Balamory (since it's on the DVD player eight million time a day)