Melancholy and Nostalgia

[Broker1981]

It's Tuesday, or actually Wednesday, and it's 4 am.

Coming home from the restaurant today i caught a ride with a friend. He has installed an insane stereo system with 6 9" LCD displays. He's also connected to the internet and he's actually running Spotify and YouTube in the car. Insane.

Anyhow i got into the back of the car and the first song that came on with video was Atomic Kitten with "The last goodbye".

Now, i'm really not all that into old girl-bands, and i don't have Spice Girls on my iPhone. However i was really taken back by this song. It took me back to 2002. To a good friend of mine who was the life of the party wherever he appeared, and to his girlfriend who was the one person that kept him grounded.

We ran a restaurant together in the winter of 2002 during the Christmas party period (November & December). We had at that time been friends for a few years, and we did a real good party season. We worked hard, and partied harder after work.

My friend had a really nice car, not quite sure what model it was but it was an MB S class. We had an apprentice who didn't drink, so he used to drive us. It's hard to explain, but there was something with the music video that got me thinking about this.

After the party season i went to Greece, and my friend ventured onto another project. I kinda wish there was some big event that pulled us apart, but fact of the matter is that we just stopped calling each other.

When i got home i got on the computer and looked up my friend on Facebook. Figured i'd have a chat and a laugh. I didn't find him. After talking with a few of my friends i learned that my friend was killed almost two years ago in a car accident together with his girlfriend. Now this is a guy who i would have gone through fire and ice for. How in the h... did this happen? If somebody had asked me 4 hours ago who he was i would have said he was one of my best friends and be ready to vouch for him in any way possible. Now he is dead and has been for almost two years...

So, now it's 4.30 am and i am well on my way through this bottle of whisky. I am taking a very belated good bye, and i'm sitting here going through memories with a tear in one eye and a smile in the other.

So, here's to Nostalgia and Melancholy!

Oh, and if somebody is wondering. We were / are both Restaurateurs through and through. We were in full agreement about this one thing. When one of us died the other person was to drink to his lief and further journey. So Cheers!

What i also wanted to say that is really important is this: Take an hour and make a list of persons you used to be friends with who you have lost contact with. Check them out on Facebook or send an e-mail. Find out how they are, so you don't have to sit at 4.40 am saying farewell to a friend who has had a severe impact on your life. Even if it's been 10 years.

Take care!

[By-Tor]

Good post.

Some people simply get much worse playing cards than others. One of my friends had great work & career & family and he had just bought a new house from a nice suburban area. Then one day all of a sudden his left leg went limb... he went to see a doctor.

Diagnose: Brain cancer. At 42. It's his second cancer... his first one was a thyroid cancer at 25. And the ironic thing is, these two cancers aren't related at all.

This is one of the nicest & most decent guys you can find. A really good friend. I have tried to keep in touch with him but he doesn't respond to my phone calls and messages. I have no idea about his condition right now and I wouldn't want to call his wife... maybe they could think it'd be some sort of invasion of their privacy in this terrible situation.

When we're young and healthy we take everything for granted. But unfortunately you never know when your (or your family members') turn comes. That's life... in the long run we're all dead. It's pretty friggin' sad when you think about it.

[P4GTR]

Broker, this one is for your friend (whats his name?).

There is always, always, a looking glass within reach that shows nothing but despair, doom, death and demise. It's your choice to either pick it up before absolutely necessary and dwell on the imagery, or turn the other cheek to it and enjoy what you can until its time. Things like this, remind you how innevitably, you'll look through it sooner or later.

[StormTooper4]

Thanks for sharing your story, life passes by very quickly sometime too quickly.

ST4

[cornerstone]

Mercedes S Class, car crash, girlfriend...

You didn't used to run a restaurant with Dodi Al-Fayed did you?

I think that even made the papers.

(Not being insensitive, just trying to lift the mood. All the best. )

[Nanuq]

It is good to allow ourselves to feel these losses at a visceral level. Every book needs a final chapter, or the story is incomplete.

But when the last chapter is read, it's good to flip back through the pages and look again.

What permanent mark did that story leave in your life?

I've lost a horrendous number of friends in brutal accidents, but the high points always ... ALWAYS outweigh the feelings of loss. I'm better for having known these fine men. That's what I carry with me. It's what I see all around me.

[dluddy]

Life has a funny way of rearing it's head when you don't expect it. Sorry to hear but as has been said - remeber the good times - they can't be taken from you.

I sell Life Insurance and feel good about what I do....

Especially when I can help those that are left behind because I helped the deceased do the proper planning for the unexpected..

Life Happens

[Broker1981]

Mercedes S Class, car crash, girlfriend...

You didn't used to run a restaurant with Dodi Al-Fayed did you?

I think that even made the papers.

(Not being insensitive, just trying to lift the mood. All the best. )

Hehe... Well, i think Al-Fayed had a bigger model... and my friends girl was a brunette.

My friend's name was Chris. He was hot-headed, bad-tempered, a bad-a*ss when it came to fighting, argumentative, often wrong and at times a consummate bastard, but he was also my friend, a loving boyfriend, protective of those he loved, and above all loyal.

I loved him, and he loved me, and we both had the scars to prove it! What's a friendship without controversy and some fights? We did however share one basic opinion: A true friend stands by you even when he knows you are wrong.

We had that too.

So, once again: Cheers Chris, wherever you are you probably have convinced the local hosts to add Cassilero Del Diablo and Braastad XO to the drinking chart!

@CS No offense taken, we're not built that way, and lightening the mood is never a bad thing.

Take care!

[highoeyazmuhudee]

yep, life's not fair, if god did exist he'd have a plethora of pending lawsuits.

some people smoke and drink till theyre 100 (george burns) and others die in infancy to horrible terminal diseases, some people have to work two jobs and others have trust funds, life is not fair, that is definitely one of the greatest lessons most people need to understand and accept, and once you've accepted that take nothing for granted. too many people i personally know use the statement "i hate my life" never realizing there are billions of people much worse off outside of their sheltered planned suburban communities. you do the best you can and enjoy the little things.