Everythingape Posted March 9, 2007 Report Posted March 9, 2007 "..yeah, I'd like an iguana with soft lips and no gag reflex, please.."
KB Posted March 9, 2007 Report Posted March 9, 2007 "..yeah, I'd like an iguana with soft lips and no gag reflex, please.." ....................... ....................... :yucky: Ken
FWATCH Posted March 10, 2007 Report Posted March 10, 2007 Well, where exactly should I post this then.
KB Posted March 10, 2007 Report Posted March 10, 2007 Uh oh I see Flo down there and that little bugger doesn't know when to shut up Not only looks like a chick but talks like one too. Ken
Dutchy Posted March 10, 2007 Report Posted March 10, 2007 Uh oh I see Flo down there and that little bugger doesn't know when to shut up Not only looks like a chick but talks like one too. Ken Just when I thought I was out......they pull me back in.
retep Posted March 12, 2007 Report Posted March 12, 2007 Mother: (turning off radio) liberal rubbish! Klaus! Klaus: Yeah? Mother: Whaddaya want with yer jugged fish? Klaus: 'Alibut. Mother: The jugged fish IS 'alibut! Klaus: Well, what fish 'ave you got that isn't jugged? Mother: Rabbit. Klaus: What, rabbit fish? Mother: Uuh, yes...it's got fins.... Klaus: Is it dead? Mother: Well, it was coughin' up blood last night. Klaus: All right, I'll have the dead unjugged rabbit fish. Voiceover: One dead unjugged rabbit fish later. Klaus: (putting down his knife and fork) Well, that was really 'orrible. Mother: Aaw, you're always complainin'! Klaus: Wha's for afters? Mother: Rat cake, rat sorbet, rat pudding, or strawberry tart. Klaus: (eyes lighting up) Strawberry tart? Mother: Well, it's got *some* rat in it. Klaus: 'Ow much? Mother: Three. A lot, really. Klaus: Well, I'll have a slice without so much rat in it. Voiceover: One slice of strawberry tart without so much rat in it later. Klaus: (putting down fork and knife) Appalling. Mother: Naw, naw, naw! Son: (coming in the door) 'Ello Mum. 'Ello Dad. Klaus: 'Ello son. Son: There's a dead bishop on the landing, dad! Klaus: Really? Mother: Where's it from? Son: Waddya mean? Mother: What's its diocese? Son: Well, it looked a bit Bath and Wells-ish to me... Klaus: (getting up and going out the door) I'll go and have a look. Mother: I don't know...kids bringin' 'em in here.... Son: It's not me! Mother: I've got three of 'em down by the bin, and the dustmen won't touch 'em! Klaus: (coming back in) Leicester. Mother: 'Ow d'you know? Klaus: Tattooed on the back o' the neck. I'll call the police. Mother: Shouldn't you call the church? Son: Call the church police! Klaus: All right. (shouting) The Church Police! (sirens racing up, followed by a tremendous crash) (the church police burst in the door) Detective: What's all this then, Amen! Mother: Are you the church police? All the police officers: (in unison) Ho, Yes! Mother: There's another dead bishop on the landing, vicar sargeant! Detective: Uh, Detective Parson, madam. I see... suffrican, or diocisian? Mother: 'Ow should I know? Detective: It's tatooed on the back o' their neck. (spying the tart) 'Ere, is that rat tart? Mother: yes. Detective: Disgusting! Right! Men, the chase is on! Now we should all kneel! (they all kneel) All: O Lord, we beseech thee, tell us 'oo croaked Lester! *thunder* Voice of the Lord: The one in the braces, he done it! Klaus: It's a fair cop, but society's to blame. Detective: Agreed. We'll be charging them too. Klaus: I'd like you to take the three boddlabin into consideration. Detective: Right. I'll now ask you all to conclude this harrest with a hymn. All: All things bright and beautiful, All creatures great and small, All things wise and wonderful, The church has nigged them all. Amen.
jonthebhoy Posted March 13, 2007 Report Posted March 13, 2007 Public Service Announcement This is the 575th post in a thread which is 575 posts too long in order to fulfil it's primary function. Please take note all! JTB
elprimerozen Posted March 13, 2007 Report Posted March 13, 2007 Public Service Announcement This is the 575th post in a thread which is 575 posts too long in order to fulfil it's primary function. Please take note all! JTB Noted sir!
Pugwash Posted March 14, 2007 Report Posted March 14, 2007 Looking for my keys, anyone found them? Did you look in the freezer?
ryyannon Posted March 14, 2007 Report Posted March 14, 2007 Public Service Announcement This is the 575th post in a thread which is 575 posts too long in order to fulfil it's primary function. Please take note all! JTB I hope you don't mean me. I don't post in this thread any more.
retep Posted March 14, 2007 Report Posted March 14, 2007 Did you look in the freezer? A miracle how did you know? Now, if i only could find my car.
elprimerozen Posted March 14, 2007 Report Posted March 14, 2007 or i will send HER to shut your mouth!!!!!!!
jonthebhoy Posted March 15, 2007 Report Posted March 15, 2007 Am I to late not to post here? No.......the 'Don't Post Here' Bus rolls around in another 7 minutes...........you just made it! JTB
jonthebhoy Posted March 15, 2007 Report Posted March 15, 2007 The bus was late. It was............rush hour down the Old Kent Road. JTB
retep Posted March 15, 2007 Report Posted March 15, 2007 Can I say something? Only if it doesn`t get us banned (sorry bad joke)
stevie7s Posted March 15, 2007 Report Posted March 15, 2007 I just got home from work and saw that I shouldnt post here. I would like everyone to know that Im not posting here like it says not to.
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